I want to have a good body, but not as much as I want dessert. ~Jason Love

You know what's better than a piece of cheesecake? Having a piece of cheesecake that actually fits into your daily caloric budget. And did I mention it had a girl scout cookie crust? Yea. It was that good.

That cheesecake proved something to me: I can eat things I love and not fall off the wagon. I just have to fit it into my day. This morning I woke up and I was still on the wagon. I had a good breakfast, an even better lunch, some small snacks, a sensible dinner, and a peach for my night time snack once the kids were in bed. I was a bit hungry and that really filled me up. I'm not sure when peaches got as filling as cheeseburgers, but it hit the spot for tonight. I also worked out today. I did a 20 minute circuit training video with Jillian Michaels to break up my walks. That will not be a daily video, but it's nice to change it up a bit.

Also, I'm proud to say I've been drinking well over my 8 glasses of water a day. About two years ago Jason got me this fantastic pink 32 oz cup with a lid and straw. I have used it on and off for the past two years. This past week or two it finally has gotten some serious use. I keep it full all day long and the second it empties, I refill it. I drink at least 3 a day now. I still am not crazy about water, but it's been easier to get myself to drink it lately. I can take that cup all over with me and it doesn't break or spill. It's a giant mommy sippy cup.

I do have one question though. How can I get more fiber into my diet? Along with my calories, fat, protein, and carbs, I have been tracking my fiber. I am getting nowhere near what I need for my daily intake. Everything else has been right in my suggested ranges except for the fiber. Does anyone have any secrets of things with crazy amounts of fiber that I should know about?

Success stories: Part 1 of many

Through this weight loss journey of mine, I keep being told, "Make sure you have a support system" I want you all to know that I definitely do. I have friends all over the country that are chiming in with positive thoughts, pointers, recipes, etc. And why do I listen to them, they all have been successful in losing weight. They also are my friends and are looking out for my best interest.

With that said, today's blog is a sort of "they did it, so you can do it too" type of thing. I got a few of my friends who have lost weight recently and asked them to tell me their stories. How much did they weigh? How much did they lose? How did they do it? Everyone has a different method, but everyone has seen results. None of them had to get a personal trainer, a personal chef, a spot on the biggest loser, or plastic surgery. And in my opinion, they all look great.

NAOMI

Naomi at her heaviest

Naomi posing with Duff, the Ace of Cakes

Naomi has been my friend of around 15 years or so. I have seen her at her heaviest and her lightest. Naomi had what I consider a typical weight gain. She got really nice and thin for her wedding and then over the years gained some weight. A lot of us do it...including yours truly. Naomi took control for good in October 2009. She says she is a firm believer in the Curves Weight Management program. This program is a free program designed to teach you how to eat the right things and it teaches you all about your metabolism and how it works. This combined with exercise at her local Curves. This combination of education and exercise helped Naomi to lose 39 pounds in 6 months...and she is still on her way.

Naomi's favorite meals, snacks, and recipes:

Naomi is very proud of her weight loss and her arms

Pancakes: 1/2 cup old-fashioned oatmeal, 1/4 cup low-fat cottage cheese, two eggs, dash of vanilla, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Blend all together and cook like a regular pancake.

Fave snacks: fat-free cottage cheese with a little low-fat ricotta, with a cut-up pear and some blackberries or blueberries, stirred up with a Splenda packet and some cinnamon.
Zone protein bars

Blue Diamond Garden Herb Flavored Almonds

Naomi also that making vegetable the biggest portion of her meal has been helpful. Filling half of her plate first with veggies and then her protein with a small side is key to a healthy diet. She also is currently managing her local Curves.

KARI

I have also known Kari since high school. She has always had a nice body and has been fairly thin. Kari's story is a little bit different. After having her two beautiful daughter's Kari only had about 15 pounds to lose and yet she still didn't feel right. She felt fat and has quoted herself as getting "too comfortable sitting down with the box of Cheezits" at night when the kids were sleeping. But that is not why she sought help. Kari was feeling more tired than she had been used to or should have been. She went in to her doctor for a check up and found out that she was diabetic. In her case, making a life change wasn't a choice...it was a requirement. Kari had to change her diet relatively quickly. 

Kari has dropped 15 pounds and is feeling healthier, but would still like to drop 5 more pounds by the holidays. She does still have diabetes, but is feeling better and definitely learning how to manage it. She sticks to around 1500 calories and does the occasional workout, though she considers hauling laundry up and down the stairs exercise enough.


Her biggest tip is to eat everything in moderation and pay attention to labels. If it say you can have 16 cheezits, that's what you have...16. Also, like Naomi, she has adopted the good practice of filling her plate half with vegetables and then adding her sides and meats.

Some of Kari's favorite foods: 
Low sugar (but not sugar free) jelly,  low sugar chocolate syrup, and low sugar syrup (which could come in handy with Naomi's pancakes). She also keeps a bag of chocolate chips on hand...she says eating about 9 curbs her craving for chocolate and doesn't ruin a diet.  


Kari says that the diabetes wasn't completely a bad thing. She considers it a blessing that she was able to lose the 15 pounds she wanted to lose and now her daughters will grow up learning how to make smart choices instead of tucking in at night with a box of Cheezits. 

Michael

Michael is a friend of mine from college. He tells it like it is and pretty much doesn't sugar coat anything. I like having him in my corner to just tell me like it is.

2.5 years ago Michael was at his heaviest. 247 pounds. It was then that he decided that it was time to make a change. 

Michael has a funny way about his weight loss, but it's honest if nothing else. Also, it is incredibly realistic. For someone such as myself, who loves food, it's tough to say no. Michael didn't, he just made changes. He learned about portions and how to get "more bang for his buck". He started tracking his food. Teaching himself what calories were entering his body and learning if those calories were fulfilling or not. He was eating the same things he always did, but in lower calorie versions. He learned about how many calories he was burning a day versus what he was eating and figured out what he had to burn in order to actually lose weight.

His wife, April, served a wonderful support system and lost a few pounds too...though she didn't need to. It helped him to have a support system and to have someone help make those good decision instead of ordering pizza for the 4th day that week. Sure, he still indulges in the occasional pizza, but you won't catch him at 247 lbs again. Michael lost 63 pounds and is now 184 lbs.

Michael before and after

Michael's diet tip must have? A digital food scale. Also, he suggests using a free calorie counting website such as http://caloriecount.about.com/. However, my favorite piece of advice from Michael has been, "Get over the 'it's good for me' BS. Yeah, 'good fat' is better than 'bad fat,' but seriously, olive oil is still 120 cal per tablespoon. Would you rather have a tablespoon of olive oil or a skinny cow bar? Yeah, that's what I thought. Me too." Tell it like it is.

My next success story piece will include my dear friends Eileen, Mandy, and Aubrey. I love to know how people lost their weight. It makes me happy and inspired.

Let them eat cake!

Tonight is girl's night! By girl's night I mean me and Chad watching girl movies and gossiping. I am so excited!

In any case, last night I got a call from Chad. He was kind of distraught. He starts the conversation with, "I kind of have a huge problem. I got sent home..."

I thought he was going to say, "with chicken pox and girl's night is cancelled." Nope.

"with my mom's homemade cheesecake. And I have a feeling it is coming to girl's night."

At first it was a GULP kind of moment. I have heard that Bev's cheesecake is the best around. How could I possibly tell him no? Then I realized that he was warning me. He was allowing me a piece of cheesecake and giving me time to work it into my calories without making it a binge. Thank goodness for friends who are dieting too and who truly get it.

I don't have to say no. I just have to figure it into my calories for the day.

Now, I'm not naive...I know cheesecake isn't the best thing for me...however, I'm going to make it work into my day. I may be required to do a little extra cardio and I'm going to really have to pay attention to everything else I eat to cut back on carbs, but I have been doing really well this week and think I can handle this.

So, bring on my slice of cheesecake, cause I'm ready!!!

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. ~Fran Lebowitz

I have to tell you. I'm not going to workout today. I'm taking a day off. I had to get up very very very early this morning to take my husband to the airport and so I am incredibly tired. I think it's only fair that I can take a day or two off. Today is one of those days. I might do some crunches tonight while I'm watching tv and the kids are in bed, but other than that...no walking with Leslie Sansone today. I just really don't have it in me right now.

I will say that I have been doing very well logging my food into Sparkpeople. I'm still starving, but I know I'm eating right. I've been checking in with my nutritionist's outline and it pretty much matches up.

I tested myself last night. I made a baked chicken parmesan (sans breading), spaghetti, and green beans. I passed on the pasta. It was a terribly difficult thing for me to do, but to balance out my plate with everyone else's I doubled up on the green beans. I felt good about my choice...though the spaghetti still looked really enticing and I almost didn't make it.

For dessert I had a fresh peach. It was soooo good. Canned peaches just don't do justice to a fresh peach. Don't get me wrong, a brownie would have made me happier...but the peach was way less calories and sugar and it filled me up slightly longer than a brownie would have. See, I know how to make good choices...I just really don't enjoy it.

Also, I made a decision today to not stop on the way home from the airport to have breakfast with the kids. I held off the extra 15 minutes to get home and cook myself. Usually when Daddy is away I try to keep the kids happy by taking them fun places and letting them know how loved they are...but right now we're broke. But, also, I don't really know what they are cooking back in those kitchens. I have worked in restaurants and I know the amounts of oil that is poured onto a griddle or the amount of cheese or butter that is put into something. Even something "Light" at a restaurant is about 500 calories. I'm sure I could have gone to the Good Egg and had Chad suggest something delicious, low in calories, and full of fiber...no doubt, he's good like that...but I don't have the energy to guess everything that goes into that delightful low calorie meal and then  log it in to sparkpeople. Though I love me some Good Egg...mmm mm mm. If you're ever in the Tucson area I suggest that for Breakfast...you can't go wrong with a single thing on the menu.

I am getting off topic. Back on track...for the next few weeks (at least) I am opting to stay home. I need to start really being strict about our budget (zero dollars and zero cents) and my waist line. So, today for breakfast Meghan wanted Scrambled eggs. Easy enough. I've been cooking those since I was 10 years old. So, I whipped up some scrambled eggs and then for myself I made a breakfast sandwich. An egg over hard on a light multigrain english muffin with a slice of 2% american cheese. On the side, a glass of skim milk and half of an orange. And let me tell you, oranges must be in season cause I generally don't like oranges, but this one was sweet and juicy and I kind of want another one.

Also, on another note, though I will miss my husband terribly this week, there is one good thing that is brought by his absence. It's a Sunday...during football season. I was raised in a drinking town with a football problem. Being alone gives me absolutely no excuse to have to make football food or drink beer...so I'm saved for a week. Today I will be watching football out of the corner of my eye while playing cars and barbies. I will be drinking my "sippy cup" of water and counting my calories.

Though this is one of only about 3 Sundays that my husband will be MIA during football season. So, if anyone has any awesome, low cal, fun football foods they would like to suggest...please do. I've got four months ahead of me of miserably staring at the chip bowl and then staring at my water and carrot sticks. So, if you have fun tailgating food ideas, ways around drinking beer and still enjoying football season. I know it can be done...I was 8 months pregnant during Superbowl XL and didn't drink. But, football is better with chicken wings and nachos.

Never mind searching for who you are. Search for the person you aspire to be. ~Robert Brault

You should know that I have an semi-unhealthy obsession with collar bones. One of the things that I strive to have is visible collarbones. Ask Jacinda...we had to go shopping for gowns back in November and I was stressing out over getting a strapless gown cause I was afraid I would look to overweight if my collarbones weren't in shape. I know you're saying, "What are you talking about? Visible collarbones?"

Here is what I mean...this is a photo of Queen Latifah. I'm sure you look at it and think, "Elegant. Beautiful. What are you talking about visible collarbones?" Well, in this photo...there aren't any.

Now, on the off chance you know Queen Latifah, don't go running and telling her I said she was fat. Cause that is simply not true. I just happened to come across the picture of her with no collarbones. And I actually think it is from years ago before she did Jenny Craig. She is gorgeous...now THAT you can tell her! I appreciate any celebrity that isn't a size anorexic.

Here is a photo Drew Barrymore when she was first announced as the CoverGirl spokesmodel. In my opinion her body is sick...and not overly thin. At least I don't think so...and she has great collarbones!!


It is just the slightest difference from soft to soft and fit.

Getting back to the point. I have an obsession with visible collarbones. So, this morning we were in the car and I said to Jason, "Well, I may not be losing any weight yet, but I am starting to have visible collarbones!!!" They are somewhere in between post Latifah and current Barrymore at the current time.

I know what you're thinking...you probably think my husband was really happy for me and filled with words of encouragement and excitement. He reply was, "Great, but don't go turning into that gross skinny girl you watch on tv." He was referring to Rachel Zoe. My husband likes a girl with meat, you see. But, I don't know if my husband realizes that when he fell in love with me I was 132 pounds with perky boobs, a tight ass, and really really really nice collarbones. So, it makes me a little self conscious that I'm not holding up to what he originally fell for. On the other hand, it kind of made me feel good that he doesn't want me to lose weight, but he is very supportive. It's important to know that the one you love is in love with you no matter what...I could probably be another 25 lbs. heavier and he would still love me. I'm a super lucky girl with a husband who loves me unconditionally, but, I'm going to keep working on the collarbones and I might throw in a tight ass for good measure.

And don't worry I will not ever go trying to look like the Rachel Zoe's of the world. That girl needs to slow down and eat a cookie...or 12.

Hear your heart. Heart your health. ~Faith Seehill

Well, so far it's an incredibly productive day.

I started logging into Sparkpeople again and I downloaded the iPhone app. Also, I checked out the Calorie Counter page that Mike suggested just to  make sense of this whole calories in and out thing. Seems like all the websites are matching up with what is going in and coming out and they are all matching up with what my nutritionist told me. I'm going to stick with Sparkpeople cause I have used it before and it is super easy for me to use...just a pain in the butt. There is a great feature where you log in all the ingredients that went into something and then break it down so you know what you actually ate. Example, last night Jason made a homemade Tortilla soup...instead of trying to figure out how much of the chicken I ate, or how much of the chicken broth I ate...I type in everything that went in and then how many servings it made and out comes this fantastic information just like you would see on a nutrition label. So super helpful.

Also, I have made my appointment to take the Curves Free Weight Management classes. When I was a member at Curves they didn't provide this service, but apparently they have added this service for member and non members alike. Thanks to Naomi I found out about this tidbit of information. Free weight management classes...they certainly fit into the budget. I think everyone who is on this journey should look into it.

I did my 2 mile walk and I did some "strength training" today. I don't know how much it counts but I did a bunch of crunches and I used my son as a weight today. I did some dumbbell squats while I held Ben and I did some bench presses with him. Not many...it's hard to bench press a wiggle child, but he's about 25 pounds and he thought it was the most fun ever. Meghan wanted to try...but unfortunately I can't really bench press another 10 pounds...so I just put her on my legs and played airplane.

Lunch was a huge hit today. Meghan loves to cook and so today she prepared English Muffin Pizzas. We used Multigrain Light English Muffins and Turkey Pepperoni. Yummmm. So, sometimes it's easy to diet and include my kids, but other times it's impossible. But, today it has been rather easy. This delightful lunch was delicious, well rounded, and fun. For a whole Light English Muffin, 1/4 cup of sauce, 1/4 cup of Part Skim Mozzarella, and 6 slices of turkey pepperoni we're looking at 229 calories and 16.4 g of protein. Paired with some Granny Smith apples for color and sweet to go with the salt, we had a really nice lunch. Also, I've already had 6 glasses of water today. That's crazy for me cause I hate water. But, I'm doing this.

Now, after a full morning of weight lifting children, cardio, and healthy lunches...I am in need of a nap. Christmas people...mark your calendars...I will be thin.

~All the so-called "secrets of success" will not work unless you do.~

I want to know the truth. I want someone to tell me what the real story is. Is muscle heavier than fat...or is that a wives tale? Also, do you actually gain weight before you lose it? Does your body really think you're going to starve since you're not filling up on french fries and Oreo cookies or is this also a fun tale that we tell ourselves when we have a bad week? And how could I possible burn more calories in one day than I consume? I burn maybe 200-300 calories doing a 2 mile walk workout. What about the other 1200 calories or so that i eat in a day...how am I working those off? Do I have to workout for 3 hours straight? I don't have that kind of time...my kids won't let me. Trust me...after a half hour I have children under my legs building lego empires in order to get me to stop and put Nick Jr back on. What am I supposed to do? And what about drinking water? YOU are supposed to drink 8 glasses of water a day, but then you suffer water weight gain. WHAT?!?!?!

All I know is that I didn't let this get me down yet. I did my exercise tonight. Starting tomorrow, I'm back to the daunting task of logging in on sparkpeople.com and following my nutritionists chart that she so carefully planned out for me. Next week, big things people!  I've got my chart which has brought me success before. I've got the tools. Now....if I could just breathe.

When we lose twenty pounds... we may be losing the twenty best pounds we have! We may be losing the pounds that contain our genius, our humanity, our love and honesty. ~Woody Allen

How do I feel today? Ashamed. I didn't even take a picture of the scale. It said 181. I went back up a pound. I'm grossed out.

We got family pictures today and I had to pass on my favorite picture because I could see my belly rolls. How awful.

So, I guess what I'm doing is wrong and I have to start over. I have to be even more strict with my diet. Workout even longer. Next week I'm going under the 180's, watch me....

I think for a week or two I am going to have to log into Sparkpeople.com. It's free, so it fits into my budget...but it's a pain in the butt cause you have to log in everything you eat and measure everything...I will slowly go insane. Every time I use sparkpeople I lose about 6 pounds and when I was really strict with my nutritionists diet I lost 6.5....so let's do this.

Hopefully, if I have to go crazy, I will be one sexy ass crazy person when this is all over.

I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work. ~Thomas Edison

It's not working. I'm not getting any smaller. I have been dieting and working out for two weeks and I actually think it is possible that my body got larger.

I am incredibly frustrated and uncomfortable. I don't have much else to say other than that today. I'm sore from working out and I'm cranky from not eating all the time. And yet, I feel no more fit than when I started, I don't feel happy, I don't feel sexy, and to be frank my stomach looks swollen today. 

I know, it's only been two weeks...but in two weeks I feel as if I should notice some sort of difference? If nothing else, I should have more energy or should be fitting clothes a little bit better. But, I'm telling you...I'm going to get on that scale tomorrow and it's going to say just what it did when I started. What the heck?

I'm going to have to start calorie counting...I hate that. You may as well lock me up in a padded cell...cause it makes me crazy. Why don't they have a show called "The Quarter Sized Loser"? For those of us who don't need to drop at least 100 pounds...I just need to drop 25. And I don't even want $250,000...I mean, I do...but I would accept the prize of losing 25 pounds. Maybe $62,500 wouldn't hurt...it is after all the quarter sized loser.

It took me a long time not to judge myself through someone else's eyes. ~Sally Field

Last night, I spent approximately 5.5 hours helping a friend scan photos from her high school years for a reunion that is coming up this weekend. While scanning we were reminiscing about college and so I brought out my giant box of photos and came across this...my former self.

Things I can tell you about this photo:

1) It was taken my senior year of college.
2) We were doing karaoke at TGI Fridays
3) The dress was a size 6.

Things I can tell you about me while this picture was taken:

1) I had a great time that night.
2) I had a huge bruise forming on my backside because I had fallen down a flight of stairs earlier in the evening.
3) I was very self conscious of myself and though I was fat.

I wish I could go back in time and let my former self know that I wasn't fat. In fact, I was really really fit and attractive...it was of course difficult to see at the time because I was surrounded by girls that were a size 2. I was always, and am still always, comparing myself to others. I was, by default, one of the big girls in college because all the others were so tiny. Size 2 or smaller. I was surrounded by dancers that had probably zero body fat and were 6 feet tall, with legs that were 5'11". I was never the most flexible, I was never the smallest, I was never the one with "the best voice"...so I was super self conscious and always trying to get to their level.

I can remember putting myself on a diet my senior year for about two weeks. I remember sitting down in the cafe with a very tall, thin, gorgeous friend of mine who was sitting with a giant plate of french fries and when she offered me one I said, "No. I'm on a diet." The worst part was that she didn't even question me about being on a diet. She didn't say, "Why are YOU on a diet?" Her answer was, "Oh. Ok." At a size 6, 132 lbs I was fat by musical theater standards.

But, looking back...I looked GOOD! I was tiny. I look back at photos of myself in size 6 and 12 and think, "Good GOD! I was super hot!" But, always in the present, I don't see a beautiful woman in the mirror. I always see overweight, not good enough, not pretty enough.

In 2002, at a size 6, I should have been at my happiest. But, I was a wreck. Always looking at the greener grass on the other side of the fence. And now, at a size 14 (12 if I don't breathe), 180 lbs...I fear I will never get back to a size where I can feel good. Or if I DO get there, will I feel good? I didn't before...so what makes me think if I'm successful on my journey I will actually feel like I have achieved anything at all? At a size 6 I wasn't good enough for myself...so what will it take? At 30 years old, will losing 25 pounds make me feel good about myself or will I still be looking around feeling like everyone is still tinier, or more fit, or prettier?

There are short-cuts to happiness, and dancing is one of them. ~Vicki Baum

It occurs to me that I did not write yesterday. I'm sorry. I was a really good girl. I ate well and exercised. Yesterday was kind of random. Meghan wouldn't give me control of my tv...I guess there was a really important episode of Dora on. So, I tried to remember what I could of the Leslie Sansone videos and "walked" in my bedroom to the Black Eyed Peas. After 20 minutes Meghan came in and threw a fit that I wasn't making lunch cause it was 11:00. So, I did 20 minutes of walk-dancing (yea, it was BEP...I was kind of getting DOWN!)...and a quick 3 minutes of continuous crunches. Then we had lunch.

It was a good day. I got to spend some time reminiscing with an old friend as she scanned pictures onto my computer from her high school days and then I received a really nice note from my friend, Mandy, saying I had motivated her to get back on the exercise wagon after 3 months of being lazy. So, everyone, "Yay Mandy! Yoo go girl!!!" (She's going to be a beautiful bride next spring)

Well, my dear friends, I have an angry 4 year old who is demanding that the kitchen open for breakfast. I will check back later.

There is no effect more disproportionate to its cause than the happiness bestowed by a small compliment. ~Robert Brault

What's the saying? Who cares what others think of you...or something like that?

Easier said than done I suppose. It's super easy to say, "I don't care what you think." And sometimes that is true. But, I must say, an unexpected compliment came my way tonight and I have been floating on cloud nine ever since. I care what others think, and I don't care who knows it.

So, why is that when people are saying bad things about us that we need to make it that someone's opinion doesn't matter? And why is it that when a person is told they look nice or they do something well that it means so much???

In any case, tonight I went to pick up some fliers and drop off some cd's at a local theater and a friend of mine said, "Have you been working out? You're losing weight." This was especially exciting because I was in jogging shorts, a crummy old t-shirt, and my hair and face were a mess. It just meant so much to have someone notice. I've only lost 2 or 3 pounds and can't see any difference on myself and he just kind of floated in like a little workout angel and made me want to work even harder. Maybe the next 3 pounds will look even better than the first 3.

So, thanks for the compliment, you know who you are.

Tomorrow, another 2 mile walk workout. I'm excited. Let's hope I get enough sleep to have energy for it.

Tell me what you eat, I'll tell you who you are. ~Anthelme Brillat-Savarin

Kids, it is terribly hard to eat right if you don't have any food. I realized this when I woke up this morning and only had food to prepare for dinner for the next 9 days and nothing for breakfast or lunch. I guess someone needs to take a trip to the grocery store, hmmm???

So, unfortunately it pains me to say my diet today has consisted of coffee, protein bars, and slim fast. I truly need a trip to the grocery store.

Before I go...does anyone have any genius ideas of things I should buy? Any fabulous ideas for breakfast or lunch. Keep in mind that I really don't care for lunch meat and have limited money. And....go...

Take care of your body. It's the only place you have to live. ~Jim Rohn

Has anybody had these Strawberry Smoothie Frozen Yogurt bars by Weight Watchers? Well, they are kind of genius. The perfect cool down snack. A serving is 120 calories (aka 1 point, whatever that means). For 120 calories you can eat not one, but TWO Smoothie Bars!!!  You only need one. Their not miniature. They are definitely normal sized freezer pops that taste like the best strawberry ice cream on the planet with strawberries in every bite. I'm kind of addicted.Don't get me wrong, this is never going to fix my severe addiction to chocolate, but when I'm simply craving cold or sweet it will definitely do the trick.

Anyway, I am currently snacking on one of these delectable treats because I just finished a 2 mile walk with Leslie Sansone. Friends, this was not as easy as the 1 mile video. My thighs are thumping and I was actually watching the clock today. "Leslie are we done yet?!?!?!" Remarkably she kept reassuring me to stick with her it was almost over. How did she know? In any case, it's quite the step up from 1 mile. I know, some of my friends are tougher than me and killing themselves with P90X and hours of working out at the gym a day...Keep up the good work friends, but, I'll take it nice and slow, thank you.

I think the 2 mile workout is going to have to stick around a touch longer than the 1 mile. Maybe two weeks this time...possibly 3...I'm not as young as I used to be. But, I'm trying to act that way!!! Not to mention they don't have anything about 2 miles available On Demand. I suppose when I get used to this workout I'll have to do the 2 mile in the morning and the 1 mile before bed?? Or someone has to ask Santa to send my video a bit early...

(If you feel like walking a quick mile...I found Leslie's beginner mile on YouTube)



Side note: the other day my friend Eileen commented that she is back to doing the Leslie Sansone videos. She is the reason I knew about them in the first place and knew they would help me be successful. In her attempt to get back on track, she mentioned that when she is about to give up and turn off the tv, she pictures me doing the workout with her. Today, Eileen, I had to picture you working with me. At one point you were standing in front of the tv calling me a sissy, then I told you to get your fat ass on the other side of the room and start walking. You did...and we look good!!!

Also, in a turn of events, this morning I posted not to tell Chad's trainer that he cheated big time on his diet last night...this morning Chad was put on a five day diet and workout plan by his trainer. My name was taken in vain...oops. Maybe we should cheat less!

“Anything worth having is a thing worth cheating for.” ~ W. C. Fields

Good morning!

I completely had a cheat night last night. 2 beers and a shared plate of italian nachos with Chad. Completely worth it. Have you ever had a plate of nachos with mozzarella, italian sausage, pepperoni, and peppers before and said, "No. That's not awesome. I'll pass."??? It was a really nice evening and I don't regret it for a second. I didn't eat nearly as much of it as my friend...I was stuffed after a few bites. However, the plate of food did disappear...don't tell his trainer. You can tell mine all you want...she's on a video tape and won't say anything back to you.

Another reason I allowed myself to cheat last night: I don't have to go anywhere today, so I don't have to face my jeans. I get to stay in my favorite pajama pants all day long...watch tv, play with the kids, do my exercise, take a nap...whatever I feel like, in my pajama pants. I have had these pajama pants for so long they officially wore a hole in the butt seam...and I still prefer them over my jeans right now.

2 mile workout today. WEEE!!! I can't wait til the weather gets a bit nicer so that I can take the kids outside for a walk. It'll be so much easier to keep off the weight of Christmas cookies if I can take a brisk walk. I'm quite the cookie baker...put in your orders now.

Things that I am looking forward to this weekend: dinner date with my husband, The Twits with my kids, and fantasy football draft.

Now, off to make good choices and get thin!

~It's not what you wear - it's how you take it off. ~

So, in my attempt to make myself feel like 2 pounds was some sort of huge milestone I attempted to put on my size 12 jeans. My 14's fit, but they are starting have that weird little bit of bagginess right at the bottom of the zipper and across the thighs. So, I pulled my 12's out. They are Old Navy Dreamers which means the truth in the number 12 on the tag is somewhat questionable...but I thought I'd test it out. So, I slid them over my legs, got them to my thighs, jumped up and down, pushed my underpants back down cause inevitably they rode up as soon as the pants slid over my backside, did a deep plie to stretch the jeans out and talk them into shimmying up just a little more and then I attempt to button....I take a nice deep breath and the zipper goes up. Can I breath? Barely. Do they slip down just enough to create a muffin top, forcing me to keep pulling them up? Definitely. Does the zipper stay up. Yes, it does. So, I figure if I keep up with my exercise and eating right, in another week I might actually be able to breath and comfortably wear these jeans all day long instead of just to run out to get bread and milk. You know that  right now they make pajama pants the most pleasurable piece of clothing on the planet...and as soon as I unzip these it's like opening a tube of Pillsbury Cinnamon Rolls. But, for the time being...I look slim. Well, slim-ish.

In other news, my friend Sam said that I should get that pedicure when I lose all the weight...she's even willing to pitch in as a prize. Score for me!

Your body is a temple, but only if you treat it as one. ~Astrid Alauda

Well, one week down...2 pounds gone. So, why am I so disappointed??? Two pounds is good. I'm going in the right direction. It means I'm doing SOMETHING right. But, I couldn't help but look at the scale and say, "Maybe if I get on it again it will say 179."

In any case, it's 2 pounds.

That photo above represents two things to me: An accomplishment on my journey and documentation that I desperately need a pedicure.

Plans for today, doctor's appointment, job interview, working FOH at the Studio...hopefully I can get in a workout...today starts 2 miles with Leslie Sansone.


That's all for now, be back later my friends.

Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance. ~Dave Barry

Good morning, friends!

Here you are, and here I am....thanks for popping by.

Well, we got a good start to our day today. I sat down and had breakfast with my kids and then we did our morning exercise. I don't know about you, but I find it easier to do it in the morning. Yesterday, I ran errands and ended up waiting til almost 3 or 4 o'clock to workout and it was rough. I was too tired, I think I half assed it. But, this morning, it felt totally different. I had a different motivation that yesterday I must have lost around noon...cause it was just...different. Forced, if you will.

So, I know you're wondering what today's workout was. Because I "have" to share my living room with my kids (they have a playroom, but insist on pulling every toy into the living room anyway) I get about a half hour of workout time and it's usually by Meghan's request. When Meghan says she is going to exercise she says she loves it for exactly 2 minutes and then she sits down and watches me for the remaining 28. What can you do? I let her choose the workouts anyway. Today she wanted to dance. So, I picked a 10 minute hip hop dance video brought to us by the makers of the Crunch series and the show Dance Your Ass Off. It was super fun and I definitely was sweating. They only offer the first 10 minutes, but I liked it, so...note to Santa, I would like you to add Dance Your Ass Off and Crunch to my Christmas list. Or call my husband and tell him to get them for our anniversary, so I can be skinny for Christmas.

Moving on, since the Hip Hop workout was only 10 minutes I wanted to get another workout in. Guess what Princess picked? "Let's do the WALK, Mom!" So, we did 1 mile with Leslie Sansone.

Tomorrow marks one week since I started this diet blog journey...so we will commemorate it by pumping up our workouts to a 10 minute dance or abs video and 2 miles with Leslie!!! Also, I need to find my hand weights so I can work off these bat flaps. You know that moment in the movie The Sweetest Thing where Cameron Diaz and Christina Applegate wiggle their underarms in the mirror...yea, I had that exact moment. "What is this? Seriously?" So...week two...tomorrow. Let's hope the scale tells me I'm doing well or I'm going to have to tell that scale to go to Hell.

Now, I am going to plan lunch and then paint my nails...thanks, Loretta.

~ If I can't have too many truffles I'll do without. ~

So far, I have made the right choices today. Instead of having a binge or a starvation day...I tried to just breathe. I had a Special K Protein Bar for breakfast. Probably not the greatest choice, I realize, but I wanted to at least eat SOMETHING and this morning I just wasn't all that hungry. In fact, I was nauseated from making myself upset.

I decided to take an hour to clear my head. I went and ran some errands and then went to the grocery store to get the usual, milk, bread, bananas, and to pick up something for lunch. When my husband works closing shifts, we try to make lunchtime a sit down family meal if we can. So, I picked up one of those "Eat Right" meals from the freezer aisle at Safeway. We ended up having a low cal high protein chicken fajita on multi grain tortilla. And instead of buying the whole bakery in my moment of self loathing and woes, I got a box of my favorite 100 calorie packs. They are little mint chocolate petit cookies....they are like heaven. So, I had those and I then took a one mile walk with Leslie Sansone.

I can't say my mood is any better than it was this morning...but I have made it beyond the craving for giant pastries. I'm patting myself on the back, because the donuts looked especially tasty today and there was a cherry cheese danish saying, "Hey, you there, over here. I can help you with that bad mood. C'mon buy yourself something pretty...I'm pretty." Evil danish. You stay in your case and get stale.

Now, what's for dinner? I don't know...I need to raid the freezer right now. We might even have breakfast for dinner...the kids love when we have scrambled eggs or pancakes at the wrong time of day. They think it's hilarious. Like we're living in an upside down universe. Little do they know, that just makes it right side up.

“If you see a friend without a smile; give him one of yours.”

Friends, I may have an emotional eating day. Or I may have a starvation day. I'm not certain.

I found out this morning that yet ANOTHER one of my friends is pregnant. This brings the total of friends of mine that have had a baby or have found out this year that they are expecting to around 12 or 13. I'm genuinely happy for every one of them. Sincerely. When I found out yesterday that Jacinda was having a girl I went through the roof and started planning for gifts. I love when my friends have babies. It extends our family. But, this my friends makes the sting of losing our baby in February that much harder as well. I keep thinking of the playmate that baby Adelaide could have had or the sibling my kids would have been welcoming this week. It hurts. I'm not going to lie. I am in a battle with these emotions at all times cause I don't want to ruin any of the experiences of any of my friends who are welcoming sweet little bundles of joy into their lives. It is truly the best thing that could ever happen to you. But, I can't help but feel like I'm being tested. It didn't work out for me this time...but really? I never know more than maybe 3 pregnant girls at one time...and I'm hit with at least a dozen on a year where I am still in mourning.

Don't get me wrong. I am grateful everyday for the two gorgeous children I have. But, I can't help but envision the world I would have had with my newest addition who would have been joining us sometime around the 24th of August. Especially since I know Meghan and Ben would have been the world's greatest big brother and sister ever. 

So, I may need cupcakes. Or just a really big hug. Or more super fattening pasta from Olive Garden.

This shall pass, and I promise Miss Jacinda and Liz, you will be getting excellent baby gifts from Aunt Amy. For the rest of you that are expecting...it's the greatest thing you're ever going to experience and I am truly excited for you to experience motherhood, fatherhood, and surrogate-hood. I wish I could buy you all baskets of diapers and pacifiers, but children also cause an illness called "nomoneyinthebankitis".

If I ask how the new babies are or how you are feeling, I mean it in a very genuine way. I love your babies and your bellies and your general glow. But, for today...I am going to cry a little, if that's okay with you.

~ You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try. ~

Folks. I'm disappointed in myself.

I had to use the car today to run billions of errands...this resulted in a really poor diet day. The kids desperately wanted to go to McDonald's for lunch. I loathe McDonald's. But, they were super good today and I haven't taken them to a McDonald's in probably 4 months...so off we went. I had a snack wrap. No fries. I ate a few apple slices that the kids didn't eat. I did okay.

Then dinner came. I was going to cook a nice healthy dinner until I realized that I needed to pick Jason up from work at 5 and by the time we got home and made dinner it would be incredibly late for the kids...and entirely too close to their bedtimes. Jason and the kids wanted Olive Garden. Well, you have to consider two things...healthy options, but also price. A lot of the things that could maybe be "healthy options" are $15-20 a plate. No thank you. Ugh. So, I ended up getting a pasta dish and I feel like a giant pig. I didn't eat the whole bowl of pasta...in fact, both of us had leftovers for Jason to take to work. But, knowing that I probably ate my days worth of calories in one meal is gross. I didn't over eat...one breadstick, a little over half a bowl of pasta, a small plate of salad...but at Olive Garden that adds up quickly...the breadstick and salad alone are 500 calories. The pasta...probably another 700. At least I had 3 16 ounce glasses of water while I was there...so I can at least say I'm getting my water in.

Oh yea, so much running around today I didn't work out. Maybe I can get a quick walk video in when the kids go to bed...I'm such a let down. I completely failed today. Back on the horse tomorrow? Sigh.

An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day. ~Henry David Thoreau

My husband has the day off today. Meghan considers this to be "family day", which means I get signed up to cook a huge family breakfast. Meghan had it in her head that I was making blueberry pancakes. One problem, I don't keep fresh blueberries on hand...I know, what the heck? So, Meghan and I got dressed and headed out the door to the grocery store. It was around 7:30 am and it wasn't terribly hot out yet, so I offered up the option of walking to the grocery store instead of driving. So, that's just what we did. Friends, I live next door to the grocery store...to walk there only takes about 5 minutes once you get through the apartment complex and around the shopping complex that the Safeway is located in. But, it's 10 minutes of walking we wouldn't otherwise have done...so it felt really good. I came home and made coffee, blueberry pancakes, center cut bacon, and poured some orange juice for everyone. It was a really nice breakfast. I'm not really certain what I will do about lunch...but I know dinner is a big salad at Oregano's followed by the smells of buttered popcorn. But, I'll only smell...I won't taste. Promise.

I think at nap time I might force my husband to do the 10 minute ab workout with me...

In other news, I got a call for a job interview that I need to return right now. Wish me luck and I'll keep you posted.

All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much. George Harrison

I went to the birthday party. I tried the different pastas, I also had a salad...I also ate a cupcake. But, I only had one...and then I high tailed it out of there!!!! It was a nice party though. Great job, Liz. I bought the Little Miss Birthday book and the Elmo's Birthday dvd for Bella...no card. I wrote our message in the book...don't know if you saw that. ANYWAY, so I feel okay about the party and my food choices. I barely filled my plate...in fact, some of the Paul Frank monkey was still visible under the different pastas...so I know I didn't overdo it. I will make sure to do my 30 minutes of exercise in the morning. So, I'm good. Now as for the dinner and movie tomorrow....I've been told Oregano's has great salads...so I think I'm set.


Meghan and Ben had a nice time at the party. They found it delightful to play with all of the babies. Meghan keeps asking for one...and now Ben carries every single one of his toys around and calls it his baby. They really really loved Bella and all the other babies at the party. They were playing so nice...nicer than they do with each other. So, the question is...will I make it to 25 pounds lost by Christmas...or will I be giving my children a sibling..I'm just going to let the universe have that one.

Everywhere is walking distance if you have the time. ~Steven Wright

Today's workout was very exciting! Wow, I never thought I'd hear myself say that.

I started off with my usual On Demand Roulette. I did the Kendra Booty Extra. Which was super fun and easy. Partially fun because I know Kendra went home after that workout and ate a bag of Cheetos. That's just how I picture her...totally real. She's not downing tofu and wheat germ. Not Kendra.

Then we tried to do some dance videos...but they were all instruction and no movement. So, Meghan said, "Mom we want to do a walk." REALLY?!?! Okay, so I started searching for the Leslie Sansone videos and came across a fitness section for kids and there was a "Family Walk" listed. The best of both worlds, I can walk and my kids can join me if they so choose. So, the video starts and it's Leslie Sansone with people everywhere and children of all ages. Meghan thought that was super cool...kids her own age ready to exercise. Here's what I thought was super cool...I got to watch real people, not models, doing the workout I was doing. And the kicker...they were all wearing black and gold. It just so happens today is the start of football pre-season for the Pittsburgh Steelers...so I thought it was an amazing coincidence...apparently I was wrong. About 3 or 4 minutes in Leslie turns to the girl on her right and says, "Great job Jen!" It was Jennifer Antkowiak from KDKA in Pittsburgh!!! She had brought her whole family. This video was filmed in Pittsburgh. So, therefore the black and gold workout clothes were completely planned. I couldn't be happier. And then I come to find that Leslie Sansone is from New Castle, PA where she lives and owns an exercise studio. Are you kidding me?!?!?! I'm sold. (For those of you that don't know...I was born and raised in Pittsburgh.) Note to Santa: I would like this video for Christmas.

So that was my exciting morning (and did I mention I started working out at 7 am today?? Getting better and it's only day 3) ...I got to exercise with Jennifer Antkowiak and do a booty exercise with Kendra Wilkinson. Did I earn my brownie batter cupcake? Oh and one more thing...HERE WE GO STEELERS, HERE WE GO!!!!!

Weekends don't count unless you spend them doing something completely pointless. ~Bill Watterson

Well, another night has fallen on me...and my stomach is empty again. But, that, my dear friends, is not my biggest worry tonight....

I have a big "birthday weekend" ahead of me. Tomorrow we have a birthday party to attend...I have already been told there will be brownie batter cupcakes. I'm sorry, I can't pass that up. I can't. My sweet tooth is already turning against me, my mouth is salivating at the mere thought that in less than 24 hours I will be faced with such succulent goodies. And I'm sure it won't just be cupcakes...it's a first birthday party...you know they are going all out. I'm prepared to come home fat. So, how do I eat accordingly during the day, workout accordingly during the day, and live during the day up until the moment when I bite into that tasty calorie factory??? Can I even have a cupcake without gaining 17 pounds and quit on myself again?? What's a girl to do?

Then Sunday, I have a birthday dinner to attend at an Italian restaurant. This won't be terribly difficult. I am going early to have one cocktail with the birthday boy...and I will honestly probably have salad or an open faced sandwich or something. I am not crazy about pasta that isn't whole grain...so while I'm sure it will smell delicious...I can pass on pasta that isn't made in my own kitchen. I can also pass on appetizers...I don't really do fried food that often...oh I love it, but I can feel the grease in my system for about a week after. So, pass. Thanks. It's the after dinner festivities that are going to be tough. We're going to see Eat, Pray, Love. Now, if the enticing aroma of buttered popcorn isn't enough to do me in, a movie where the leading lady eats perfectly plated international delights for 2 straight hours might throw me into a super binge Sunday night when I get home. Lock up the cereal cupboard.

So...here's to Monday?

I have to exercise in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. ~Marsha Doble

Day 2 of a four month journey (after four months what happens? hopefully maintaining). Am I hungry right now? No. I had a good breakfast, snack, and lunch. I have been drinking my water and I did exercise two days in a row. I'm mixing it up cause I have the attention span of a four year old...how do I know this??? I have a four year old and she lets me know when something is boring to her.

Case and point: I love to do the Leslie Sansone Walking videos. They have 1 and 2 mile On Demand and it's easy but you definitely sweat and it's good for my knees. But, I did that for about a week with Meghan in the room and by day 3 she was saying,"Mom. Not this again. We've already seen this one." Oh, I see, it's okay to watch Madagascar 2 three times a day, but a 20 minute workout 3 times a week is boring.

The good side, while I'm working out, she wants to join me. I'm starting her on a good path of not being lazy and staying in shape. My son too. He is 2 and so all he does is march, but at least he tries. (I can't do much working out on the floor though cause he thinks we're going to play horsey...oh dear)Meghan gets frustrated and asks why we have to do these workouts everyday...i tell her she doesn't have to, but if she would like to join me she is welcome to. Also, I told her that mommy is getting in shape so we can go to Disneyland next year and I can walk the whole park...she was immediately down for the exercise challenge.

So, back to the topic at hand...I have to mix up the workouts. Yesterday we "walked a mile" with Leslie Sansone and we did a 10 minute ab workout. Even my husband got involved. My son did his very best to try and sit on my husband's stomach during the workout, but he still got to do some of the crunches. Yesterdays workout was good. Meghan said today she wanted to dance, we met in the middle and did a 10 minute Biggest Loser cardio workout and then I alone did a 10 minute Yoga Abs video. I didn't enjoy either. The host for the Biggest Loser video was Tara...she was one of my least favorites and it was super hard to follow her. As someone who has a background in music and dance I cannot tolerate when people have no rhythm. She had none, so I had to see what she was doing and then close my eyes and not watch her til she said we were changing steps. The yoga abs I won't do again...I have to be moving...I'm not a stay in one place and hold kind of a kid. So, hey, lesson learned. Day one was better than day 2. I might host a dance party with my kids after dinner just to burn some calories and make up for Tara's lack of rhythm and leadership skills. Meghan liked the Black Eyed Peas...I think we'll Pump It for 20 minutes later on. Tomorrow, I have my eye on doing the Kendra workout since hubby won't be home...he scoffed at me when I mentioned it was On Demand and proceeded to tell me why he finds Kendra and Kim Kardashian unattractive. It had nothing to do with their bodies by the way, but he didn't want me to do the workout cause he finds Kendra annoying I guess. Whatever, I think she's funny and I'm going to maybe test out her workout tomorrow.

PS I'm still not crazy about working out...but I am destined to find something that works for me...the real woman, mom, and reality tv couch potato.

So, hurdle two of the day. I am really really tired. How can I combat this? I am taking the vitamins my nutritionist suggested, drinking my water, I cut off caffeine for the most part after breakfast, I get between 6-8 hours of sleep a night...so any ideas from my friends in cyber land?

And note to Santa Claus (or to any of my friends out there that might want to just pretend to be Santa Claus within the next four months): I would like a blender for Christmas. I would like to make these delicious protein shakes that Sarah keeps telling me about...but I have no blender. (and no money...remember the budget? poop.)

Well, the kids miraculously are napping...so I think I will grab a half hour or so...see you soon?

A bushel and a peck and a hug around the neck.

I woke up this morning and had 4 messages in my email from people telling me they had read my blog this morning!!! Thank you so much for the motivation...you know who you are. It's been so nice to have people write me and say I am motivating them to get back to working out or just to get life going. It is awesome having people write and say, "I get that. I'm the same way!" You don't even know how important that feedback is to me. When I'm sitting around today I can say, "Someone is waiting for me to get off this couch today and workout." Thank you for expecting good things from me and for allowing me to motivate you! Thank you for the feedback. I hope you'll stay tuned, keep coming back to read everyday, and tell your friends...the more feedback I get the more successful I hope to become. Thank you for the support, guys!

Hunger is sharper than the sword.

11:17 pm. Just got home from seeing a show and I'm wide awake. I'm talking with a friend. Most importantly I'm STARVING!!! I'm positive if I tracked my food today that I would be out of calories. I had an energy/protein bar at the show instead of the snacks that my friend so dearly tried to throw to me during his song (M&M's and cookies..a dream come true for a sweet tooth) and that held me over til now. But, now I'm starving. And thirsty. I'm going to have another giant glass of water and then talk myself into sleeping. I'm trying not to give in, but the cereal cupboard is calling my name. Lucky for me the fridge and the glasses are in the front of the kitchen...the cereal is in the back and I would have to also bend down to get it. So, since I'm not going that way, I'll pass...but kids, I'm hungry. I'm not going to lie. It's an ugly feeling and I'm weak to temptation. The good thing...breakfast is in 7 hours...I think I'll have eggs.

Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing. ~ Walt Kelly

Well, folks, there it is. The truth. 182 pounds. It seems to be where I settle in. I don't really gain much more than that....and I only get about 3 pounds lighter than that before I give up cause I get stuck again. But, that is the last time you or I will ever see that number on my scale again. 

It's not the most I've weighed. When I had my son, I was 226 pounds. I stopped eating red meat, only ate ground turkey and chicken for the most part (I also wound up anemic and found out that I need to heat lean red meat), this is when I started with whole grain pasta and whole wheat bread, and I was walking 4.5 miles 3-4 times a day with my mom. I got down to 168. Then I moved to Tucson. I lost my support system (my husband doesn't really count...he was supportive when I was 226...he loves me unconditionally and that is wonderful), I lost seasons that allowed me to walk the park, and then I got pregnant and really stopped trying. I very quickly gained 10 pounds and lost the baby. I still haven't lost the 10 pounds. I lose 3 and then gain it back, lose 6 and gain it back...then I eat a pound of chocolate and talk myself into believing that being this size is totally fine. And it is fine...but if I wanted fine, I wouldn't be me and I wouldn't be here. I want exceptional. I want to walk into a store and not go to the 14's and hope that they fit or know I have to buy the XL shirt and only in two or three particular styles. I don't want to have to pose for pictures hiding behind my kids or be self conscious about if my chin is up and my tummy is in.

So, game plan. I am promising you and myself that I will make it a point to workout 3-4 times a week. I will either go to my gym at my apartment complex or do a workout that I can find On Demand. Nothing extreme...20-30 minutes a workout. I'm going to try and follow my nutritionists plan...it's a lot of protein, fresh fruits and veggies, and whole grains. I may or may not count calories. I haven't decided. There is a free website that I can use that has helped me before, but the point of this is to do it without feeling like a slave. I'm a mom who is always on the go...I gotta eat what the family eats and they need to eat what I eat. It's going to be a really interesting balance with a two year old and a four year..that is probably the trickiest part of the whole thing...hot dogs and chicken nuggets are not exactly on the menu guys. But, it's not gonna be tofu and bean sprouts all day. Real food, real people, real budget, and real results (I hope).

So, here we are, day one. 25 by Christmas...here we go!

Tomorrow is a new day

Talking to Sami...my source of all things inspirational these days...and we were discussing how she has been losing so much weight. I know how to lose weight...I've done it...so why am I stuck where I am? Cause I hate counting calories, I hate being a slave to portions and writing down calories, I have very little time or energy for exercise, and let's be honest I don't really enjoy exercise. I wish I had Bob Harper pounding on my door every morning saying, "Let's do this." But, I don't...so I need to pull from my resources...that's you. I need for people to check in everyday, see how I'm doing, root me on, hope for a successful weigh in every week, etc. I can't do it with just myself and since I live with the skinniest man on the planet...I need support from my friends and I know I have a fantastic support system out there. So, I'm crying for help I guess.

Let's make one thing clear. I don't eat poorly. And I barely drink alcohol these days. I don't have to force myself to make the switch to veggies and fruits or whole grain and whole wheat...cause I already do that...I just have to make the switch to really force myself to eat the portions my nutritionist set for me and to do the exercise I should be doing. So, starting tomorrow I'm going to weigh in, let you in on my food secrets, tell you about my down falls...etc...it'll be a jolly holiday with Amy.

"Why tomorrow? Why August 12?" you ask?? Why not? It's always the right time to make a really good change. I want to keep some curves...but lose some fat...and why not kick it off now? So, off we go...I hope you're ready for the journey.

All my love.

My first entry!

I was talking to a friend today who said she was so excited to have started a blog. I never got the point of a blog, but she said it's wonderful and therapeutic. So, I thought, "Why not give it a try?" Then, I have to think of what to write. What do I know that nobody else does? I know me. I can tell my funny stories, get out my daily rantings, and talk about me...which as everyone knows I kind of love.

So, here I am and here you are...and I'm glad we're here together.

So, for my first entry I though I would recap my weekend adventure. After four-plus years of being a stay at home mom, I finally got a few days off. By that I mean no children at all. No responsibility. Just me. So, I drove to LA for my friend Melodee's wedding. The trip was great. 8 hours of listening to whatever I wanted in the car, singing as loud as I wanted, eating egg salad sandwiches and drinking diet pepsi, and just having time without diapers and barbie dolls. I was a little lonely once I got there, but I definitely got to relax a bit. I needed that. Thank you, honey.

So, getting to the wedding...Melodee was completely gorgeous. The wedding was in Hollywood and the reception in Malibu. Let me break it down for you. I stayed in Calabasas, 20 minutes from the wedding and 20 minutes from the reception. But the reception and wedding were in opposite directions. Oh dear...get out the GPS. So, the wedding was over and we had two hours to waste in between, so Hoost (aka Justin Kopplin) says, "Let's go to my house and freshen up." Okay, no biggie he probably only lives 10 minutes away, I can see his place, freshen up, maybe have a glasss of water, and we'll head out.  Nope. Why would I think that someone who is known for being late would just want to freshen up and get back on the road? It was a 30 minute drive to his house...followed by a picnic lunch. It was delicious...but we also had food waiting for us at the reception. However, this time spent with Hoost was fantastic. I got to see his place, eat mint ice cream, and catch up.

We got on the road later than we had hoped and I told him, "It's an hour away."
He replied, "We'lll get there in a half hour...we're fine. We'll be right on time." Nope, I'm looking at the GPS...it says 59 minutes...I then proceeded to go about 85 on a 55 mph highway. I got lucky with no cops around...It still took us an hour. While we were at the church we were told the reception was going to be valet parking at the inflated price of $20 a car. So, when we arrived at the reception site we thought we'd cheat the system and park on the road...there were a ton of cars parked on the road...so we followed suit. This next part is verbatim:

"Where is the room for Mel's reception?"
"Oh it's around here. I mean how many weddings could there be?"
As I am clearly looking at a sign that does not say HOLSINGER/ BRIDGES, it said something like SHAO/SEOUL, "It is LA. and they did just legalize gay marriage. There could be about 75 here."
"We're fine."
Valet: 'Can I help you?'
"We're looking for the HOLSINGER/BRIDGES wedding"
'You're going to go to the end of this road, turn left at the T, go down the hill...you'll see the sign.'
"See. We're fine."

We proceeded to walk for maybe 7-10 minutes after already arriving 30 minutes late. It was UP a huge hill, around the corner, and down another HUGE hill! In HEELS!!! And as for the parking...not $20. Valet only if you wanted...and, again, not $20. Well, needless to say, it was an experience...and we cracked up the whole way. Life gave us lemons and we made lemon drop shots.